2001-05-06 - 3:14 p.m. - pro_musica1

I got back from my piano lesson a bit ago. This was the pre-competition stuff... I'm glad that my teacher has never told me that I'm fine when I haven't been before, because that makes it much easier to believe her when she tells me that I'm not doing so badly. I'm still nervous, though; I don't think any amount of preparation could ever dull my nerves. I think the shaking will begin tonight, or if I'm lucky not until tomorrow morning. This is just one more reason I probably won't be able to go into music. I love music, really I do, and I won't be able to stop for a good while yet (and God help me if I do), but if I were to take it as a career, I'd probably soon burn myself out. I'm going to have to remember to breathe and to keep time in mind tomorrow... otherwise I'll be about five times faster at the end of the piece than I was when I started. I can do this.

As if pre-competition nerves weren't enough, my foot has started sending shooting pains to the nerve centers of my brain. God knows I need this now. Just fantastic. I suppose I'll live somehow...

And to think that I was in such a good mood just a couple of hours ago. Jeez, where do those moods go? I wish I could can those feelings so that I could take them out whenever I needed to feel good. Just a few hours ago I was on top of the world because I was going to do just fine with the piano...

My Latin teacher recommended to my mother that I go to UC Berkeley's summer program for Ancient Greek. She's a wonderful woman (my Latin teacher, I mean - my mother too, definitely, but in this case it's the former). I want to be like her when I grow up.

That's enough of this ramble. I'll probably be back later tonight after I've taken my cello lesson.