2001-05-18 - 11:29 p.m. - brevis3

Fun and games with J await you. Honestly. The sleepier I get, I'm told, the more amusing I get, until finally I become stark raving mad and have to curl up in a ball somewhere and be wound down.

I'm expecting a baby... it's going to be named Tami, no matter what its gender... I'm due in three months (a miracle of modern human male scientific doohickey thingamabobs that shorten the gestation period). My friend is the father, but she doesn't know it yet. She will soon.

I need to blow out some steam... my mother yelled at me again today. Lessee. This time it was "you're throwing away the respect that other people give you" - just of me in general but also the fact that I show up in the gay-straight alliance photograph in the yearbook, and also of my practice habits and a bunch of other things, and - oh yes, "you never put things back where they come from." That, friends, is a gross exaggeration. I am generally very good about putting things back where they came from, with only the occasional lapse (this is how I know I do not have OCD and am not a perfectionist, despite what my friends claim). Grr. Deep breaths...

I feel the tension ebbing from my body already.

I want to be held, to be touched... at this point, I don't care who does it, but there is something within me that cries for human contact... gentle, strong, a bulwark, something to lean against...

"Ein feste Burg ist unser Gott, ein' gute Wehr und Waffen..." -Martin Luther

Have yourselves a dandy night.

J (:>